3 Things to Do When a Family Member Won’t Change Their Toxic Behavior

Speaking up early on can prevent resentment from building and help you feel less powerless in the situation. For example, maybe you tell your aunt that you can’t come to a family gathering and she guilt trips you and insists that you must attend. You could respond with something like, “When you say I have […]


How to Make the Most of Your Time Off, Even If Your Family Is Exhausting

This article is part of SELF’s Rest Week, an editorial package dedicated to doing less. If the last few years have taught us anything, it’s that taking care of yourself, physically and emotionally, is impossible without genuine downtime. With that in mind, we’ll be publishing articles up until the new year to help you make […]


How to Deal With Family Stress During the Holidays, According to Therapists

I’m going to assume that whoever first said the holidays are the “most wonderful time of the year” didn’t grow up with deeply difficult family dynamics. As a psychotherapist who specializes in helping folks struggling with issues pertaining to cultural and intergenerational conflicts, many of my clients’ feelings about the holidays are far from wonderful.   During […]


How to Cope If Family Gatherings Trigger Your Social Anxiety

Thanksgiving is nearly here, and I’m starting to feel a bit jittery about all the awkward interactions I’m about to have with family members and long-lost acquaintances from high school. The small talk always seems to cover the same ground: work, relationships, politics, future plans—you know, all the touchy topics that get to the core […]


Might I Suggest Faking a Holiday Nap?

There’s nothing like visiting your parents to help you assess the origins of your personality traits. From my mother, I received endless energy, obstinance, and curiosity—though I tragically did not receive superb hand-eye coordination. From my father, I received resourcefulness, endurance, and a love of dancing—and, also tragically, I did not receive his ability to […]

Food & Nutrition

An Auschwitz Survivor on Hunger, Tradition, and Her Relationship to Food After the War

When Rosalie Simon was 12, her family was evicted from their home in Kriva Velka, Czechoslovakia, and sent to Auschwitz, the Nazi extermination camp that killed 1 million Jews—one sixth of the total that died during the Holocaust—in less than five years. In her darkest moments, she tells SELF, she couldn’t help but think about […]